daniel_marlow | Filtered away from Val - Edited just to Zoe, Cai and Rachel

Theres some guys in my building i can get pot from if you actually want?

Er...do you know if they're safe?

Actually, I- I don't know because I'd have to go outside to smoke it but I can't sit in the chair yet because sitting hurts too much.

They seem ok. Just guys. Say 'hey' to me in the stairs when i see them.

But ok, maybe don't set off the bathroom smoke alarms. Ask for more pain meds?

Ah, I see.

No, I wouldn't do it in here. God, I don't even know how to smoke weed. Never done it before. I'm on pain meds, it just hurts still anyway. And I don't want to overdo it because I've been here for a month already and I don't want to get addicted to opiates!

A month, wow...

Holy shit, a month and a half. Fuck. Holy fuck. Oh holy fucking shit.

Are you freaking out?

Just a little. Feels like this all happened yesterday still.

Yeah, yeah i know, me too.

Augh, I've been here for six weeks. Augh.

We should do something nice for your birthday though. I mean. As nice as it can be in here.

Hey a real thing for my birthday! What do you want to do??

Screened

daniel_marlow - 2014-09-15 11:59 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Screened

runrachelrun.insanejournal.com - 2014-09-15 12:03 (UTC) - Expand

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daniel_marlow - 2014-09-15 12:05 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Screened

runrachelrun.insanejournal.com - 2014-09-15 12:16 (UTC) - Expand

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daniel_marlow - 2014-09-15 12:19 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Screened

runrachelrun.insanejournal.com - 2014-09-15 12:20 (UTC) - Expand

Are you fucking kidding me, both of you?

What?

It just hurts, Zoe.

I know, but you're in a hospital, Danny, they can give you something legal and safe.

It's not working and I don't want to get addicted to opiates besides. I thought weed was safe?

I mean...it's okay, I'm not going to smoke a doob in the hospital. I don't actually even know how. I was just...wishing.

Don't have they things in place stop stop you getting addicted? And some weed might be safe but weed Rachel can find from losers in her building is a stupid idea.

They're not losers, they're just guys.

Whatever, Rachel, they're probably losers and guys. Whoa!

Hey. Don't.

I dunno, maybe? I've been on morphine for like 6 weeks, that can't be great for me. I just can't get comfortable no matter which way I lie down because there's my ribs or my other places and it is not fucking fair.

You know- and yeah, a lot of it's self-inflicted, but I kind of thought when I got rescued I wouldn't be in pain any more. That was kind of stupid.

Have you talked to Abby about it? Maybe she'll know something.

I'm so sorry we didn't find you sooner, Danny.

Well I bitched about it and she did that doctor, 'give it time' thing which argghhhhhh. I mean she's right but AAARRGGHHHHHHHH.

No, Zoe- No. Are you kidding me, you- Zoe, when I think about the fact that you fucking found me at all, I know it's miraculous. And I'm going to close this post to just us because I'm talking about this. But- You had a vision and you saved me. No one else. You. Thank you.

He didn't even touch me in a...you know, sexual way for the first few days. I think he was trying to see if he could talk himself out of it? But he still hurt me. I don't understand. I don't understand why he thought that was somehow better?

Maybe because he's a sick twisted evil fucker who doesn't even deserve to exist on the same planet as you.

We tried. I just can't help but think, if we'd tried harder... you know?

Zoe I saw you, you were pushing yourself to the limit as it was.

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lightningseed.insanejournal.com - 2014-09-15 12:01 (UTC) - Expand

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daniel_marlow - 2014-09-15 12:36 (UTC) - Expand

Yeah. Remember how I cut my hands to shreds when I tried to escape? He used that. He would squeeze my hand so hard every time I wasn't cooperating. One time he kneeled on it for so long and my other hand was tied so I couldn't get him off of me and I passed out and then he was so annoyed he elbowed me in my broken ribs. I've never been tortured before, you know? I can see how it works in interrogations because I would have told him anything.

You can't do that. You can't beat yourself up. Zoe. I am alive because of you. I know you well enough to know you were trying as hard as you could.